Friends

Photo by Josue Michel on Unsplash

What is a friend? What makes a person you know, a friend? I’ve been thinking about this as I try to make new friends and keep in touch with old friends. I’ve spoken about how I lost myself when I was a young mother busy with 4 young children. I lost contact with so many friends and moving to a different city didn’t help. Being a stay at home mom has made it more difficult for me to make new friends since I didn’t get out much. I have met a couple of moms at school and we do keep in touch via messages but we don’t really meetup or connect much. I’ve talked about how I try to become friends with my children’s friends’ moms. I’ve talked about how the gym was my time alone and I avoided socializing. Until, I started going to a new gym, started working out with a person trainer, we’ve gotten closer over the past year and sometimes I wonder, are we friends? I’ve met two sweet girls who share the same personal trainer at the gym. We’ve exchanged numbers, encourage each other to go to the gym and eat healthy. We’ve supported each other when we went through losing a family member. Are we friends? We don’t talk regularly, we don’t always see each other at the gym. We do ask about each other, our families, things going on our lives. Does that make us friends? I am 10 years older than them! Does that make me too old to be their friend? Does it matter? I don’t know why it has become so hard to make friends as adults. I miss those simple days of making faces and becoming friends when we were kids.

I don’t regret losing touch with so many people, because the people that matter are still in my life, even when we’ve lost touch for a while, when we reconnect it seems like we’ve always been in touch. I need to remember how special these friends are. It doesn’t matter if we aren’t in the same city. I have friends in different continents that have been there for me and have helped me get through hard times and have celebrated my accomplishments and joys in life.

I know I do overthink friendships. Maybe I should just be grateful for all the friends in my life whether we are still in touch or not. Their friendships were special at a time, or still are and have all made my life better and brighter. I need to remember to enjoy all the connections I make. I don’t need to be very close to them all. I guess every friend has a purpose in your life. Only some, of them are meant to be so close to you, that they know you more than you know yourself, Maybe it’s just that one friend. If you have one keep them close and realize their value. They are the best kind of friend you will ever have.

As I find myself again and make new friends, I will try not to over think things, I will try to enjoy those small moments and appreciate them.

So to all my friends past and present, thank you.